Unexpected guests

I knew Joseph had his secrets
A past he did not share
I never nagged for details
Then, one morning, from thin air
He revealed a former life to me –
A weird scenario –
A saga of misdoings fit for
Jeremy Kyle’s show.
When he told me he had brothers
That was only half the tale –
Eleven! Also sisters, with
Many children (mostly male),
And a father, in his dotage,
With three wives (and one deceased)
And a retinue of servants,
And a flock of ruddy sheep.

So they all came down to Egypt
To stay with us, because
Of famine back in Canaan.
Convenient? Or what?
Of course I laid on ev’ry comfort
I supplied their ev’ry need,
And after only one brief fortnight
I was nearly on my knees.
“My dear” I ventured, late one night,
When our two boys were sleeping
“I can’t go on like this, you know.
The mess is past believing!
The house is overrun with kids
(Not just the human kind)
Their mothers shrug, and laugh at them,
And turn an eye that’s blind.
The washing up – it never ends!
We’ve turned to paper plates.
And who d’you think is laundering
More than sixty pairs of sheets?
The old man needs a zimmer frame
So can’t you see to that?
I’m worried that he’ll stumble
Over our Manasseh’s cat!

And the internet is struggling –
They’re all online at once!
Netflix films from noon till night
(All mindless violence…)
They refuse to worship Isis,
Or Osiris, even Ra,
They forget I’m a priest’s daughter,
They’ve really gone too far!
And, Joe, some are expecting.
Well – quite a lot, you know.
At the rate they seem to increase
We’ll soon be overthrown!
I know they are your rellies, Joe,
I don’t want to make a fuss,
But can’t we keep them down a bit –
Or insist they’re more like us?